tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-256208762024-03-13T15:14:39.171-06:00Created For Community...on Life's JourneyCreated For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.comBlogger88125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-69897416124044621122013-10-07T11:47:00.000-06:002013-10-07T11:47:17.902-06:00Gospel-Centered Community or Christian Social Club?
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<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Life in a small group community can be a
fun, challenging, growing, difficult, and learning experience. These words provide
a glimpse into the reason we keep showing up to our friend’s house on Sunday evenings,
week-after-week, month-after-month, and possibly year-after-year. We desire to
do life together with other believers. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Consistently gathering together with
others who are experiencing life at the same harried pace you are offers us
comfort, a moment to catch our breath and realize that we're not crazy, and a
place we can be known and accepted.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">This is good! Yet the descriptive words
that I tossed out a moment ago may be clear indicators that your small group
experience is really, really good. Yet in the midst of something you and others
enjoy, there is the potential that your group could be missing the most
important aspect of community life—the gospel! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I’ve recently been reading through the
Book of Acts, and it’s caused me to wrestle with the question: What’s at the
heart of a small group? I’ve come to realize that most small groups fit into
one of two categories: either you’re in a gospel-centered community or you're
participating in a Christian social club. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">I’m sure that may seem a bit harsh at
first, but the reality is that whenever believers gather together for a season
of time, we gravitate to one side of the fence or the other. We either drift
toward fun-loving fellowship or to gospel-centered intensity. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">There is absolutely nothing wrong with
having a great group of Christ-following friends. However, hanging out with Christian
friends alone is not enough to produce consistent, fruit-bearing, spiritual
growth.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: large;">Here’s what I mean:</span></div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Your group is either seeking God’s truth together in the Bible, or it’s not.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Your group is either seeking to allow the person of Jesus to be at the center of your meeting, or it’s not.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Your group is either engaging with the work of Jesus on the cross to transform your hearts and minds, or it’s not</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Your group is either inviting the Holy Spirit to work in your lives, or it’s not.</span></li>
</ul>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">This is not some legalistic plea to make
your group more religious. Instead it is submitting everything you are,
everything you do, and everything you face—to the feet of Jesus.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">A gospel-centered small group community
is centered on what the name might suggest; the intentional practice of placing
the gospel at the center of every small group gathering. It really is about
Jesus in your friendships, in your decision making, in your parenting, in the
stewardship of your talents and treasures, in your pursuit of biblical truth—in
everything! Jesus and His transforming work are brought to bear on all of
life—the good, the bad, even the seemingly indifferent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Does this describe your typical small
group meeting? Or do chips and salsa, fantasy football teams, and creative
ideas from Pinterest take precedent? Is the gospel of Jesus Christ the reason
you meet? Is it what fuels the week ahead? Or are social interaction, casual
conversation, and friendship at the true heart of your small group?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Lest you think this some anti-friendship,
anti-laughter, or anti-fun post, rather it is<i> </i>a challenge to consider what is truly at the center of your small
group? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Ultimately, we all desire and need genuine
friendships and fun-loving interaction—but we need the gospel more!</span></div>
<!--EndFragment--><!--EndFragment-->Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-5709123664025966672013-06-18T14:02:00.001-06:002013-06-18T14:02:59.304-06:00Father’s Day Follow-Up<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Father’s Day is one of those days. It strikes
each one of us differently. Some have fond memories of their childhood because
their Dad was the guy who played catch with them and then followed-up the fun
with a quick trip to DQ for a twist cone. Others have sketchy memories because
their childhood was dotted with moments of laugther and long periods without
Dad around. Still others had a father whose behavior was so offensive it didn’t
even endear him to a grace-giving child. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Looking past these quick caricatures of the
father you had—or didn’t have—is risky for any community of faith. The relationship
we had with our earthly father deeply influences our view of God, the way we
treat our spouse, the way we parent our own children, the way we view work, and
the way we view ourselves. (Just a few rather important things!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Because of this, Father’s Day gives you a
starting point for some rich discussion for your next small group meeting. Likely,
this discussion won’t be easy, but it could be a discussion that just might
open up deeper realities about the people and the stories represented in your
small group community. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">As you move into this disucussion, encourage your
group members to consider the words of James about the consistent nature of our
heavenly Father. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-left: .25in; margin-right: .8in; margin-top: 0in;">
<i><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">“Every
good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the
heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; margin-left: .25in; margin-right: .8in; margin-top: 0in;">
<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">James
1:17 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">Earthly fathers impact each one of us deeply—some
help, some hurt, some harm. In the face of our own personal experience, strive
to help your small group engage with the reality of their fatherly experience.
And then, turn to the steady trustworthy character of our Heavenly Father. </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-2446174406289903202013-03-07T18:07:00.000-07:002013-03-07T18:10:12.306-07:00Structure is a Blessing<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Do you chafe under the weight of
regulations, or are you liberated by parameters?</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The idea of boundaries—or a lack
thereof—is something for every small group leader to consider. Which
environment works best for your small group? Which context is the best fit for
your particular leadership style?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I met with a small group leader this week
who had some interesting insight into the importance of structure. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">His group began a few years back in the
three-week Small Group Launch environment where we establish the biblical
foundation for doing life together in community. We also unpack details of what
small group community looks like at our church that might be different from
other churches.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This structure proved helpful for the
original four couples for the first few years of their time together. They
thrived, in fact! Then, life change started happening. One couple moved to a
new state. Another couple had a dramatic shift in their home life, and things
began to change. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The remaining group members wanted to stay
together, so they invited in some new couples (families) to join them. Over
time, the couples and their children have integrated well. And they continue to
do life together nearly five years after the group first began.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">But something is different. Something
that was hard for the leader to wrap his mind around initially. After months of
processing and wrestling, he landed on what’s different. The new couples don’t
have the same understanding, the same commitment to the group’s structure.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This isn’t a bad thing, necessarily. But
it is something the leader feels a strong desire to re-establish among his
group—a commitment to everyone understanding the importance of group structure.
His desire is not to be heavy-handed about it. Rather, he sees this as an opportunity
to bring the group members closer together, and moving in the same direction.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Structure; without it, a small group can
be good—but likely, will struggle to be great. </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-75804271827684632322012-11-27T17:20:00.000-07:002012-11-27T17:20:32.524-07:00The Impact of a Few Beads
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Who doesn’t like to be encouraged on your
faith journey?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I believe encouragement is one of the
greatest benefits of doing life in community. When you’re feeling tired, down,
stressed, overwhelmed, the encouraging words of a person who knows you is like
thick blanket on a cold night—it warms you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">One of the most powerful times of
encouragement I’ve ever experienced in community took place when I least
expected it—on a short-term mission trip to Haiti last summer. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Our ministry team partnered with a young
and growing mission organization called Global Orphan Project. During the day we visited their orphan
villages spread throughout the impoverished nation and invested in the lives of
the orphans. At night, we gathered to debrief about the day’s experiences and
what God was doing in our hearts and minds. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">That’s when it happened. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The leadership team from Global Orphan introduced
our group to something they do to encourage one another. It’s called a bead
ceremony. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Here’s how it works: There are four
different colored beads. Each one stands for something specific—red represents
risk, blue stands for leadership, white is for service, and green represents
compassion. You grab the appropriate bead, walk over to the person who exhibited
this virtue during the day, bless them with the bead, then briefly tell the
story of how you witnessed the individual put the specific virtue into
practice. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Each night, God used the bead ceremony to
bring laughter, tears, and powerful feelings of gratitude for the different members
of our group. The impact of a few words of encouragement was dramatic for each
one of us. It caused us to see how God was at work in each other’s lives. It
encouraged us to get out of our comfort zone and bless someone else with words
that we rarely hear spoken in our frenetic, me-first culture. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This begs the question; couldn’t we put
the bead ceremony into practice within our small group communities? Couldn’t we
be intentional to offer specific words of encouragement to those we do life
with week-after-week? Couldn’t we take the biblical exhortation (Hebrews 10:25) to
encourage one another to an entirely different level than we’ve ever
experienced before? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Give the bead ceremony a try. It just
might be the words that you and the members of your group need to hear. </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-31507513246223103172012-10-31T20:31:00.000-06:002012-10-31T20:31:14.675-06:00It’s Not All About YOU!<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia;">A light
bulb flipped on with piercing brightness for a small group member this weekend.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia;">He’s not
new to small groups. In fact, he’s participated in them for a few years. But something
from God’s Word struck him afresh. It came from the words of the writer of
Hebrews. In the 10th chapter, we find these words:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Georgia;">“And let us consider how we may
spur one another on toward love and good deeds, <span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit
of doing, but encouraging one another…”</span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Georgia;">Hebrews 10:24-25 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">The truth
that struck this small group participant was the realization that community life
is not all about receiving. It’s not all about what you will get <i>from</i> your interaction in community.
Rather, it’s about what God can—and will—do <i>through </i>you in the context of your
small group.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">How can
God use you to spur another on? How will God use you to encourage someone else?
What will God do through you to deeply impact the faith journey of another?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">It may
seem basic, even simplistic, but this reality is one of the most overlooked and
misunderstood aspects of community life in the church today!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">You and I
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purpose just might not have anything to do with our spiritual goals or
purposes. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Small
group life is genuinely more about others than it is about self. That’s why I
love Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s quote from his classic book <i>Life Together</i>, “The Christian needs another Christian who speaks
God’s Word to him. He needs him again and again when he becomes uncertain and
discouraged…The Christ in his own heart is weaker than the Christ in the word
of his brother.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Here’s
the life-giving reality of life in a healthy small group—it’s not all about
you!<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-35702746042412674042012-08-30T11:49:00.002-06:002012-09-05T17:34:51.797-06:00Three Questions to Discuss in Every Small Group Gathering<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<!--StartFragment-->
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-z1PIEtLUf1I/UD-mSkS6lsI/AAAAAAAAAMY/2AGFZZ88T3s/s1600/Discussion+Questions+-+Blog.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><img border="0" height="220" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-z1PIEtLUf1I/UD-mSkS6lsI/AAAAAAAAAMY/2AGFZZ88T3s/s400/Discussion+Questions+-+Blog.jpeg" width="400" /></span></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Some
discussion questions are better than others. We’ve all experienced the reality
of this in one small group gathering or another. You know, the
fill-in-the-blank answer that’s always “Jesus”. The leading question that seeks
an overly touchy-feely response that would make even the most tender-hearted
person blush. The question that’s overly pushy in offering an application for
everyone in the room. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">With
this in mind, a small group leader and I discussed three questions that should
be at the core of every small group gathering. Here they are:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">A Head Question:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Every
time your small group meets, you should strive to engage with the intellect
(the head). We should be challenged to consider the truth presented to us from
the Scriptures or other Bible-based materials about the character of God.
Whether your group is a collection of mature believers, people who are new to
the faith journey, or somewhere in the middle, it’s always helpful to consider
afresh who God is. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This
model is something the Apostle Paul regularly used when he was writing one of
his epistles. He began with a truth/fact of about God, before moving to his
heart-level impassioned plea for action. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">A Heart Question:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This is
the question that brings authenticity and rootedness to your small group
community. When you use discussion questions that cause group members to tell a
bit about themselves—not just about what they think—you’re creating authenticity.
Authenticity creates depth. Depth grows roots. Discussion questions that cause
people to examine their own lives, their marriage, their parenting, etc.
Questions that stir something deep within our hearts, bringing real-life to the
forefront of group life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">A Hand Question: <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">After
the head has been convinced of a biblical truth, and the heart has been compelled
to respond, the hands should be challenged to act. Always close out your
meeting time with discussion questions that lead a Christ follower to some
practical application. This will help take the discussion from theory to practice,
from simply a nice idea kicked around in someone’s living room to a gracious
act at the local community center that brings God glory.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">These
three questions, in some form, may already be part of the discussion questions
for your current study material. Likely, you’ll need to tweak the questions to
make them engage a head, heart, and hand question structure. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Give it
a try. You’re small group time just might become that much richer!</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 13pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-64469421223856390732012-07-31T23:14:00.000-06:002012-09-02T02:32:47.887-06:00Three Keys to Processing a Tough Summer<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Colorado has been a place of tremendous unrest
this summer. That’s an understatement, actually. Colorado’s Front Range has
been the location of great tragedy; with lives lost due to senseless violence
(Aurora), and lives and homes lost to nature’s fury (Colorado Springs).</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">So, instead of talking about baseball, grilling
brats, and enjoying family vacations, many in our community have been
challenged to wrestle with deep, deep loss.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">How can a small group community help bring some
measure of healing? Allow me to suggest
three primary ways:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>1. Acknowledge
Pain/Doubt/Fear/Etc.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">At your next gathering, ask group members
to open up about their personal heart-level engagement with whatever tragedy has
impacted them. Talk about your struggles with each other. Discuss your doubt. Share your fears. Be honest!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It’s not natural to watch a beautiflul mountain
range burn. It’s not normal for us to witness our homes, or those of our
friends, on fire. It’s unfathomable to consider the local movie theater as the
scene of real gunshots, and the death of friends, family, and co-workers. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This stuff is hard to comprehend. That's why everyone must begin by being honest with our wide spectrum of thoughts and emotions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">2.
Read <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Then, after you’ve gotten to the core of your
thoughts and emotions, take some time reacquainting yourselves with what Jesus
says about the tough stuff of life. Open God’s Word. Read it. Together.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Start with John 16:33. Hear the words of Jesus.
Allow His words to provide much needed perspective on our sin-filled world.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>“…</i><i><span style="background-color: white;">I have told you these things, so that in
me you may have peace.<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><u>In this
world you will have trouble.</u><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>But
take heart! I have overcome<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>the
world.”</span></i></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Jesus tells us that we <i>will</i> have trouble. It’s not <i>if
</i>trouble will invade our lives, rather <i>when
</i>it will happen. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">After Jesus gives us an honest assessment of our
situation, He offers us something more important—hope in Him! He has overcome
the doubt, pain, frustration, anger of life in a fallen world where gunmen kill
innocent people and where beatiful homes catch fire. Jesus has overcome all the
sin and death that we can fathom. And from His lips we hear, "But take heart!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">3. Pray<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">How can we “take heart”? Through prayer. We can
do it by a posture of submission to the One who has overcome. We can bow our
knee to our Lord. The Lord of Heaven and Earth. The sovereign God who we don’t
fully understand and comprehend, yet trust with every aspect of our lives. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">We can “take heart” by bringing our collection of
messy thoughts, feelings, and emotions to Him. We can cry out to God in
frustration. We can whisper to Him from a heart of worship. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">This is a picture of you and I living out our
faith in community. As we acknowledge the tough stuff of life, turn to God’s
Word for perpsective, and submit to Him in prayer. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">God, in turn, helps us to begin to overcome the
things that rock our world.</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-83333433818776900242012-05-23T11:28:00.000-06:002012-05-23T11:28:36.941-06:00What Are You Reading?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The kid’s school year is coming to a close. That means the local public library is promoting their summer reading plans for kids of all ages.<br />
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That begs the question; what about the big kid in the mirror? Seriously, what’s on your reading list for the summer months?<br />
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It’s a question that all leaders ought to ask—whether you lead a ministry, a small group, a family—or all of the above. Not in a guilt-inducing, burden-imparting sort of way, rather in a way that communicates the significance of this life-giving discipline.<br />
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A rhythm of reading is critical for every Christ follower. Reading can bring tears to our eyes. Reading can cause a lump to well up in our throat. Reading can humble us, or cause us to rise up and praise our Heavenly Father. Reading stirs the mind and the heart. Reading can stretch our thinking and introduce us to new ideas.<br />
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Whether you’re reading a popular Christian living title, a Theological treatise, or the latest New York Times bestseller—reading is one disciple that every leader ought to consider a priority.<br />
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Developing your discipline of reading will benefit two important people/groups:<br />
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<b>1. You</b><br />
The Apostle Paul exhorted Christ followers to be transformed by the renewing of our mind (Romans 12:2). How can our mind be renewed if we are not consistently exposing it to what’s gone before (history)? Or to what’s happening today (contemporary culture)?<br />
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In his book, <i>Practicing Greatness</i>, author Reggie McNeal writes of the importance of spiritual leaders being exposed to fresh insights and ideas. “They are curious. They want new vistas. They want new conversations…Seeking out new ideas can be as simple as reading in a new subject or a new author.”<br />
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Reading also solidifies what you already know to be true. It causes you to more deeply engage with the things you already believe. How? It causes you to better understand the foundations of what you believe, and to have a solid argument for the things you don’t.<br />
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<b>2. Your small group members</b><br />
When you develop a rhythm of reading, your day-to-day conversations and interactions with friends will have more spice.<br />
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Consider for a moment someone you know who’s an expert on a specific subject; classic cars, World War II history, apologetics, etc. It’s easy to enjoy a conversation with someone about their field of interest because they’ve read and read and read some more about their subject. They’re expertise on the subject matter is invigorating.<br />
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Is this true of you? Do you bring new insights, thoughts, stories to your conversations because you’ve immersed yourself into a good book?
Those you lead will be richer because they’ll get to sip from the cup you give them—having drunk deeply from the well of Scripture, theology, history, etc. Your scholarship has a direct impact on those you do life with in community.<br />
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So make time this summer to grab a good book, a comfy chair, a cool beverage—and read!<br />
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Note: My summer reading list includes: <i>Your Church is Too Safe</i> by Mark Buchanan, <i>Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Prophet, Martyr, Spy</i> by Eric Metaxas, <i>The Return of the Prodigal Son</i> by Henri Nouwen, <i>Serving with Eyes Wide Open</i> by David Livermore, and <i>The Batboy </i>by Mike Lupica (with my son).<br />Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-40272042960557797582012-04-16T14:57:00.002-06:002012-04-16T15:03:44.772-06:00Are You Leading in Obedience?Obedience is a word we adults rarely use when talking about ourselves. We’ll throw it around occasionally in the context of parenting, but rarely does it reach our lips when talking about our own lives or the lives of those within our small group. <br /><br />Why? <br /><br />Perhaps the issue of obedience sounds legalistic? Maybe it suggests we lack grace? I’m not entirely sure why it’s nearly extinct from the Christian’s vocabulary, but I believe it’s a word we ought to reintroduce.<br /><br />Recently, I was reading through a portion of Psalm 119 and was struck by the Psalmist’s emphasis on obedience.<blockquote><span style="font-style:italic;">“This has been my practice: I obey your precepts.<br />You are my portion, O LORD; I have promised to obey your words.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">Psalm 119:56-57</span><br /><span style="font-style:italic;"><br />“I will hasten and not delay to obey your commands.”</span> <br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">Psalm 119:60</span><span style="font-style:italic;"></span></blockquote>Certainly, I was already well aware of God’s call to faithfulness. Ye the depth of the Psalmist call to obedience caused me to think again.<br /><br />Whatever ministry position we find ourselves in, whether it’s vocational or volunteer, our life must be marked by obedience—to God’s Word and obedience to the Spirit’s leading. <br /><br />Obedience is not an option. It’s not something I can do later. It’s not just important for others. A life marked by obedience is for me. It’s for you. It’s for the Christ follower. It’s for those who serve God’s people in any capacity of spiritual leadership.<br /><br />That’s why pastor, author, martyr Dietrich Bonhoeffer once said, “Only he who believes is obedient and only he who is obedient believes.”<br /><br />So here are a few practical questions with which we must regularly engage: Am I living my own day-to-day life in obedience to God? Am I doing what God is asking me to do in serving fellow believers? Am I listening to the Spirit’s leading as I lead my small group? <br /> <br />Ask yourself these tough questions. Obedience cannot be overlooked.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-33838293846432477902012-02-28T14:39:00.002-07:002012-08-18T18:51:11.610-06:00Four Reasons Your Small Group Should Talk About Your Pastor’s SermonFellow blogger Rick Howerton, whom I respect greatly as a leader in the small group movement, recently posted a blog detailing three things that a small group should <span style="font-style: italic;">not</span> discuss—among them was the Pastor’s Sunday sermon. His reason? Gossip. I agree, if that’s where things inevitably turn.<br />
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However, I’m going to subtly disagree with my fellow small group apologist. Allow me to explain. While I am not a huge fan of a small group digging into the pastor’s message week-after-week, month-after-month, year-after-year, I do believe it can be a valuable tool for discussion and growth for a season of time. And I believe it can serve to challenge group participants in four very important ways. Here they are:<br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold;">1. Consistency –</span> There is an expectation that small group members are in church each weekend. Group discussion about the sermon provides a measure of accountability for everyone. Subsequently, if an individual or couple can’t make it on a given weekend, there is the expectation that you’ll grab the CD or listen to the podcast of the sermon. This keeps you up-to-date with the sermon series, and keeps you engaged with the direction the pastor is leading your congregation.<br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold;">2. Focus –</span> Many times, people are in church, but they’re not fully engaged. When a small group agrees to spend time talking about the pastor’s message, it requires a deeper level of commitment. Group members will likely listen more attentively, they’ll likely take notes, and they might even dig more deeply into Bible passages presented in the sermon. <br />
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There’s just something about knowing that your friends and peers are expecting to hear how God spoke to you through a message that ratchets up everyone’s ability to focus.<br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold;">3. Deeper Understanding –</span> When a pastor teaches, he often communicates much more than most of us understand at first. Certainly, he teaches the Biblical text. Also, he often teaches Theological truths and the vision of the church in subtle ways that support his Biblical teaching. When a small group discusses the message—including its subtleties—it helps small group members get a deeper grasp of the church’s beliefs and philosophy of ministry. Great stuff for any small group to process and discuss in community!<br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold;">4. Application –</span> One size does not fit all when it comes to personal application of a sermon. The Holy Spirit will instruct, guide, and lead you differently than He does another. That’s why it’s helpful to talk about the Spirit’s leading in your faith journey from your pastor’s Bible-based message. You might be led to respond with your heart, another with their hands, and another with their head in deeper intellectual pursuit. Processing these things in the context of community can help to refine and clarify your personal application. <br />
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To read Rick's original blog post go to: http://blogs.navpress.com/rickhowertonCreated For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-47720099619805473292012-01-31T22:27:00.002-07:002012-01-31T22:31:00.800-07:00Are You Leading in Humility?Recently, I had the privilege of gathering with other pastors from my area to watch a simulcast event where a small group of famous pastors engaged in thought-provoking dialogue. The event was called <span style="font-style:italic;">The Elephant Room</span>. It’s the brainchild of Pastor James MacDonald. <br /><br />The concept of <span style="font-style:italic;">The Elephant Room</span> is to get influential pastors from different denominational and cultural contexts to a common table to discuss critical issues facing the church today. <br /><br />MacDonald took plenty of heat from within the broad evangelical community for some of the guests he invited to participate. He didn’t back down. <br /><br />What happened because of MacDonald's faithfulness, and lack of need to be liked by all of his peers, was something that will stay with me for a very long time. I witnessed genuine humility, respect, and honor, offered freely between pastoral peers. <br /><br />It was stunning! <br /><br />One prominent pastor inquired and inquired again about another’s Theological position on core doctrines—with respect. Another up-and-coming leader repeatedly submitted to the wisdom, maturity, and experience of other pastors involved, before sharing his own opinion and perspective. <br /><br />The discussions were poignant. The issues were real. Opinions differed occasionally. Yet at the core of the entire day of dialogue was humility presented to one another in grace.<br /><br />The thought that I couldn’t help but wrestle with was this; why does this sort of interaction seem to be the exception, not the norm, among church leaders? <br /><br />Whether we lead a church of 10,000, a discipleship ministry, a Sunday school class, a small group, or our family—humility toward our peers (and those we serve) should be a hallmark of our leadership. <br /><br />The tough question we must all ask; is humility a hallmark of my leadership?Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-58263032233932811422011-12-14T14:39:00.002-07:002011-12-14T14:45:28.245-07:003 Abnormal Gifts for Your Small Group This ChristmasWhite elephant? Nah, everybody’s already seen your awful Christmas sweater, smelled your industrial-sized drum of cheap perfume, and heard your Chipmunks’ Christmas carol CD. They're just not that funny anymore.<br /><br />Creative gifts? That can work, but finding the perfect gift for your closest small group friend(s) can be a major stresser! It can bring an awful lot of un-needed emotional pressure this time of year. And what if you swing and miss? <br /><br />Here’s a different idea; how about getting your small group a group gift? Kinda like a gift for your whole family. But this one’s for your spiritual family. <br /><br />The idea is for you to give a gift to each other that will be a blessing to everyone in your group. Something that will minister to each person/couple at a deep spiritual level. Something that someone outside of your community couldn’t give to each other.<br /><br />Here are a few ideas:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">1. Daily Prayer</span> – Give the gift of committing to prayer for each other every day for a month. Let’s be honest, we often talk about praying for each other—and some of us do—but many times our prayers for our group members are less-than-consistent. This ratchets things up a notch! <br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">2. Bible Reading Accountability</span> – Here’s a way that you can truly help each other get closer to God. Employ a reading plan that encourages and helps each other read the Bible daily. A couple of our small groups are using a new Bible product called <span style="font-style:italic;">The Books of the Bible: New Testament</span> by Biblica. (<a href="http://www.biblica.com/thebooks">www.biblica.com/thebooks</a>) It’s an NIV translation of the New Testament that reads like a story—as they have removed all verses, chapters, and chapter headings. The Bible reading plan is very doable, covering 10 pages of reading, five days each week. This will get you through the entirety of the New Testament in eight weeks!<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">3. Serve Everybody Once</span> – Each person/couple likely has some project (i.e. taking down Christmas decorations after the holidays) that needs attention. Pick something that your group can do as a community. Then bang it out in far less time than the person/couple could do themselves? This is the sort of gift that goes beyond what a mere ‘thank you’ will ever cover. <br /><br />Just a few ideas to help your group become a true faith family this holiday season.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-24729242661247668922011-11-28T14:15:00.000-07:002011-11-28T14:17:28.900-07:00Facing Unrealistic ExpectationsWhat do you expect of your small group members? <br /><br />Faithful attendance? Promptness? Having read this week’s study materials? Must all members come prepared to talk about the latest NFL battle, have a fresh joke in their arsenal, and bring a gooey baked good? Warm hugs at the door? Working toward BFF status?<br /><br />Here’s the question at the heart of it all; are your group’s expectations of each other realistic?<br /><br />Similar to the expectations wrapped up in a marriage—that a spouse will meet all my needs—small group participants often have expectations that simply go beyond what’s reasonable. The desire can be something like this: close friend, trustworthy confidant, accountability partner, prayer warrior, Bible scholar, and pastry chef. <br /><br />Let’s not forget a few more items of utmost importance for group members: great parenting skills—exhibited in near-perfect kids, a fairytale marriage, a strong sense of humor, and a nice pad (complete with a man-cave) to host the whole shebang! <br /><br />The problem with this thinking is that every group and every group member will collapse under the weight of these unrealistic expectations. <br /><br />Sinners let each other down. Period. <br /><br />We all fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). We all bump and bruise each other. As Christ-followers, we often fail to live up to our own expectations—much less the expectations of others. <br /><br />Unfortunately, our lives are messy. We don’t always pray as we say we will. We don’t have perfect children. Our marriages often lack grace. <br /><br />So, what are we to do? How should we engage with others who just don’t live up to our expectations? Consider the practical counsel of The Apostle Paul regarding life among other fallen members of a Christ-centered community. <br /><br /><span style="font-style:italic;">“Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you…Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.”</span> <span style="font-weight:bold;">Colossians 3:13-15</span>Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-11752614424383184622011-11-16T16:10:00.001-07:002011-11-16T16:28:43.384-07:00Facilitators of ReconciliationEarlier this week, I had the privilege of leading a number of new small group leaders through an evening of training. I love that!<br /><br />We spent a few hours revisiting the Biblical foundations for small groups, unpacking the vision our church has for community life, examining the different developmental stages of an individual small group, and we worked through the nuts and bolts of structuring a healthy meeting. <br /><br />Those things were great. <br /><br />But there was one portion of our evening that I enjoyed working through more than any other—presenting small group leaders with the weighty challenge of their call to be ministers of reconciliation. <br /><br />In their classic book on small groups, <span style="font-style:italic;">Making Small Groups Work</span>, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend explain clearly the role of a small group leader—what it is and what it is not. <br /><br />“God has not called you to be moral police who set people straight. He has called you to help restore life unto Himself in the way it was created to be. The Bible’s word for this is reconciliation. God’s purpose is to reconcile things back to Himself and to use you in that process.”<br /><br />This is something that should both energize and intimidate each of us who lead a small group of God’s people. Energize, because you have been given the gift of walking alongside His children and pointing them to the Reconciler. Intimidate, because God has given <span style="font-style:italic;">you</span> this significant responsibility. You are not the one who does the work of reconciliation, but you will be used in the process. That’s powerful!<br /><br />Often times, the leadership of a small group can be draining, unrewarding, even discouraging. Yet, if we take time to re-evaluate the calling—as a facilitator of reconciliation—it just might inspire us anew.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-80202586420387070582011-10-31T21:33:00.002-06:002011-10-31T21:37:32.026-06:00Is it Time to Go?Is it time for you to move on? Time to step down from the weekly responsibilities of leading a small group? Is it time to lead your small group by moving on altogether? <br /><br />These are very difficult—yet honest—questions for any small group leader to consider. <br /><br />You’ve invested your time, your energy, and more important—your heart—into the lives of the people in your group. You’ve spent hours praying for them, hours preparing for your study time together, hours looking for creative ways to bring the group closer. Yet you find yourself in a weird place—there seems to be a disconnect. <br /><br />The things you thought the group wanted in a Christ-following community no longer seem to be what the group wants. The strengths you brought to your role as group leader—no longer seem to be strengths the group needs. <br /><br />Like many successful professional football or basketball coaches have experienced, a leader’s voice can begin to trail off. Your group once heard you loud and clear, and responded favorably to your leading. Today your guidance comes through softly, without little or no response. What’s a leader to do?<br /><br />Here are a few suggestions:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">1. Pray </span>– God needs to hear your heart. He needs to know your commitment to His purposes in this community of His people. Be honest with Him about your former joys <span style="font-style:italic;">and </span>your current struggles. <br /><br />Then do something that’s hard for many leaders—listen! Listen for His still, small voice to guide you. Are you being released from your role as leader? Are you being given the freedom from God to step away from the role of shepherd of His people?<br /><span style="font-weight:bold;"><br />2. Talk</span> – Be honest with your small group about how you’re feeling, what you’re wrestling with. Sometimes, just being forthright about your recent struggle to lead will get things moving in the right direction. (Typically, this won’t fix all the problems—but it’s a start!) If your honesty leads to a difference of perspective about the current state of the group, (or the future direction) perhaps you’ve come to a point of departure. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">3. Announce</span> – After you’ve talked with God (and listened to Him) in prayer, talked with your group members, and come to the conclusion that it’s time to move on, be clear about your intentions to step down as leader. Be clear about your plan to move on. When you leave, be sure to communicate why you’re leaving and what your future plans include. This is critical to bring appropriate closure to your tenure of leadership. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">4. Strategize</span> – As you depart, work with group members to figure out who will be stepping into leadership of your community. (As hard as this may be, the selection does not hinge on your opinion. The selection of a new leader works best when done by the entire group.) A gracious hand-off is helpful for the success of the leader moving forward! <br /><br />Give your replacement any leader tools, tips, and resources that you found helpful for leading your small group. Encourage the new leader(s) to connect with the pastoral leadership of your church’s small group ministry, and be sure to communicate this leadership transition with your pastor.<br /><br />Transition is never easy. But it can be done in a way that honors all parties involved.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-77773688482539035092011-09-30T20:49:00.001-06:002011-09-30T20:53:14.015-06:00Missing YouYou’re group’s back in the groove. You’re meeting regularly again, after taking it easy over the summer. Your discussion times are lively, your prayer times are meaningful, and the snacks are tasty as ever. Things are firing on all cylinders again!<br /><br />Here’s a question for you to consider; what did you miss most about your group over the summer months? <br /><br />At your next small group, ask group members to think about that question. (Assuming, of course, that your group did not meet regularly.) The friendships? The support? The prayer time? The Christ-centered discussion? What did each person/couple miss most without their small group community?<br /><br />While at first glance, this may seem a bit too touchy-feely, this question can give great insight into the true strength of your community. <br /><br />When you go without consistent relationships that encourage, support, challenge, and stretch you, it’s easy to become stagnant. Complacency can set into your faith journey, your marriage, your parenting, etc. That’s where the power of doing life together in Christ-centered community comes into play—other believers call us to a better place. Others of like mind and heart want more for us, and they help us get there. They speak words of truth. They pray for us when we need it most. They deliver the love of the Father presented through familiar faces.<br /><br />So ask the question, and learn something about those in your community. When you do, you’ll also help your group members realize and more deeply appreciate the immense value of your small group.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-76959608563083680532011-08-31T23:31:00.002-06:002011-08-31T23:36:06.084-06:00Have You Had Your DTR Conversation?The kids are back in school—or will be very soon. You’ve held your fantasy football draft. The grill is soon to go into hibernation. Labor Day is upon us. And your small group is ready to get back into ryhthm.
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<br />Have you had the conversation? Have you <span style="font-weight:bold;">D</span>efined <span style="font-weight:bold;">T</span>he <span style="font-weight:bold;">R</span>elationship with your small group members? Are they committed to another year of study, prayer, and doing life together?
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<br />I spoke with a longtime small group leader this week who did just this. He fired up his grill, threw on some burgers and brats, enjoyed a time of catching up, sharing summer vacation stories, and talking about the new school year. That’s when he sprung it on them—“Are you interested in coming back for another year of small group?”
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<br />The leader’s question wasn’t one of intrusion. It’s wasn’t pressure packed or guilt inducing. It was simply an attempt to get a handle on what his small group looks like moving forward. Who’s in? Who’s out? Who’s interested in continuing to develop relationships within your small group? Who’s feeling the nudge to move onto another Christ-centered community?
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<br />As each group partcipant shared his/her level of interest, or lack therof, in returning for another year of small group life, the leader had a clearer picture of what people were looking for in the coming year. Now, he’s in a better place to lead, shepherd, and serve. (One couple even got emotional about how much they missed the relationships during the group's summer hiatus.)
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<br />Have you had your DTR conversation? Go ahead. It can give you much-needed direction for the upcoming ministry year ahead.
<br />Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-61748391191467242782011-07-18T10:04:00.002-06:002011-07-19T09:27:05.770-06:00The Flying Leader’s GuideJust moments into his small group gathering, the veteran small group leader of a long-standing small group had heard enough. He tossed his leader’s guide to the ground and took a long hard look at each person in his living room. <br /><br />What caused such righteous frustration? What made this mild-mannered, godly man lose his cool? Reading? Preparation? Investment? Or, should I say, the lack thereof?<br /><br />The leader’s frustration mounted moment-by-moment as each couple in his group acknowledged their lack of preparation for their weekly small group gathering. As he went around the room to inquire about initial thoughts on the study materials, he got a room full of blank stares and “didn’t get to it” shrugs.<br /><br />One couple hadn’t done the 20 minutes of prep time required because of house guests. Another couple couldn’t work through the study during the week because they had busy work schedules. The next couple hadn’t found the material all that compelling the previous meeting, so they chose not to dig in and discuss it together. And the last couple mentioned their large dog and his huge appetite…<br /><br />Are some of the reasons couples don’t get to their study materials during a given week valid? Of course! And grace should be given liberally. But a consistent pattern of “no-reads” can make any leader crazy. So what’s the answer? How do you make your small group intriguing from week to week? How can you help your people to engage? <br /><br />Here are three tips that just might ground the next flying leader’s guide:<br /><br /><strong>1. Make sure that every member of the group is interested in the particular study.</strong> The quickest way to lose group members is for the leader to chose a study on behalf of everyone else. Avoid that temptation. Select a study/book/DVD resource that has the interest of all group members. Can’t get consensus? Work to find something that almost all can agree upon and be somewhat excited about.<br /><br /><strong>2. Be specific about study expectations for your next meeting—before you leave the current meeting.</strong> Once you’ve completed your discussion, spell out what you plan to cover at your next gathering. <br /><br /><strong>3. All study guides are not created equal. Use only the best study questions.</strong> Most study guides will offer up eight or 10 questions. There’s no way that most small groups can cover that many questions with any sort of depth. You don’t have to! Select three or four that connect with your group members and where your people are on their journey of faith. Then dig into those three questions with intentionality and fervor. If you can tell group members the three or four questions you’ll be digging into next time, that will help them better prepare.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-871115158077931682011-06-28T09:30:00.000-06:002011-06-28T10:33:42.091-06:00Move Beyond the Social-Only Meeting“Talking. Plenty of really engaging dialogue.” That’s how one small group leader described his start-up small group to me recently. <br /><br />Since this group of young parents formed in the spring, they have deeply appreciated their time together. Therein lies the problem. The group has enjoyed each other’s company so much—they haven’t moved beyond talking and socializing. There’s been no study of God’s Word. No praying with and for each other. And no discussion or planning about the future of the group. <br /><br />Essentially, what they’ve done since they formed as a group three months ago is hang out as fellow Christ-followers. Nothing more. Nothing less.<br /><br />While I firmly believe that it’s important for any start-up small group to error on the side of building community (as opposed to immediate in-depth study), most people actually desire more from a small group community. <br /><br />So what is the best way to get past the social-only meeting? Pray. <br /><br />Prayer is the quickest way to help a group move past a purely social gathering into some depth. The simple act of asking for prayer requests invites people to open up. It creates an environment for deeper honesty. It helps people peak out of their shell and volunteer a bit of information about themselves. <br /><br />And then, taking the next step to actually pray together takes your group to yet another level of depth. When you hear another person speak things that are important to you in prayer to the Father your hearts are naturally drawn closer. And your community is strengthened. <br /><br />In their excellent manifesto on small groups, <em>Making Small Groups Work</em>, clinical psychologists Henry Cloud and John Townsend write, “Coming together for prayer in small groups connects people with God and each other…it draws us close, vertically and horizontally.” <br /><br />Pray. Pray about your kids, your job, your friends, and the needs of your church. Pray.<br /><br />Move beyond a social-only gathering into a more personal and meaningful group time by coming before the Father—together.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-89312091854349376262011-06-02T11:53:00.002-06:002011-06-02T11:55:51.166-06:00Four Tips to Ensure Your Small Group Fails This SummerNow that school’s out, your summer vacation is planned, and you’ve geared down, it’s time to consider what to do with your small group during June, July, and August. <br /><br />If you’re looking for a sure-fire way to destroy your small group this summer, put these four tips into motion and watch your small group fall apart like an old baseball stadium on implosion day. <br /><br /><strong>1. Stay in touch on Facebook only</strong><br />Be sure to avoid any face-to-face time. Don’t get together for a barbeque. Don’t meet together for a few minutes at church. Don’t even set up play-dates for the kiddos. Just type out a friendly message every other week or so.<br /><br /><strong>2. Don’t Mention your Family’s Summer Plans </strong><br />Going away for a week this summer? Go stealth with your groupmates. Just leave. Enjoy yourself. Then when you return, don’t tell anyone. Be sure not to tell your group members about your summer schedule. Hide your family calendar at all costs! <br /><br /><strong>3. Don’t Pray for Each Other</strong><br />Praying for your group members might actually draw you back into getting together as a group again—you know, a heart connection. So keep it simple—don’t pray for them. Tell them on Facebook that you’ll pray, but be sure not to follow through.<br /><br /><strong>4. Agree to Get Together in the Fall</strong><br />If you can go an entire summer without meeting, you’ve set a pattern that will continue in the fall—no small group meetings! No more times of Bible study and discussion. No more group prayer times. No more “doing life together”. Congratulations, you’ve successfully ensured that your small group is a thing of the past!Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-77744312211818983992011-05-26T10:10:00.001-06:002011-05-26T10:14:26.485-06:00Does Your Disdain for Meetings Affect Your Small Group?Let’s face it—most of us don’t like meetings. You know, the kind that have an agenda (allegedly), where there’s more engaging conversation about last night’s ballgame than strategizing, and where decisions typically get “tabled” until the next meeting. You’ve been there. And, let’s be honest, you don’t enjoy them any more than I do.<br /><br />The question is; does your disdain for these sort of meetings negatively impact your level of engagement and participation in your weekly small group meeting? If you’re frustrated with a string of boring get-nowhere meetings, here are two quick tips to make sure your small group doesn’t suffer the same fate:<br /><br /><strong>1. Have a Plan</strong><br />Whatever sort of meeting you’re involved with—work-related, PTO, baseball coaching—things go more smoothly if there is a specified plan. Your small group gathering is no different. <br /><br />People like to know what they can expect when they get together. They like to know what the focus will be for the next hour and a half of their lives. As a leader, it’s your job to communicate your plans for the evening as soon as you have everyone’s attention. <br /><br />This helps everyone feel at ease that there are no surprises—and gives them the opportunity to prepare their mind and heart for what comes next. <br /><br />You don’t need an official agenda, but clarifying a plan at the beginning can make a big difference.<br /><br /><strong>2. Lead with Respect</strong><br />We’ve all been in meetings where the leader/facilitator clearly did not have much respect for you or your time. They don’t say it, and it’s not an intentional thing, but they lead their meeting without a specific plan. They often toss in a joke here and a rabbit-trail conversation there. (Sometimes this is needed to loosen people up a bit, but more often then not it’s due to a lack of concern for others.)<br /><br />This is the sort of thing that makes people not want to return to your group each week. <br /><br />So the recommendation is to lead your small group meeting with intentionality and purpose. Lead with a sense of urgency. Lead with a sense of meaning and purpose and focus. Not rushed, of course, but with a goal in mind. That goal might be an evening of prayer, an in-depth study time, or the sharing of each other’s stories. Whatever the goal is, it’s your responsibility as a leader/facilitator to guide your group down the right path.<br /><br />Getting bogged down in trivial things will slow your group’s progress and frustrate group members. Try not to recreate the disdain they have for corporate and PTO meetings in your small group. Instead, lead your group with respect for people’s time and concerns.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-25001308593170232182011-05-13T12:13:00.002-06:002011-05-13T12:18:15.867-06:00You Know How I Have LivedA group of church leaders that I have the privilege of journeying with is currently working to memorize Acts 20:16-24.<br /><blockquote><span style="font-style:italic;">“Paul had decided to sail past Ephesus to avoid spending time in the province of Asia, for he was in a hurry to reach Jerusalem, if possible, by the day of Pentecost. <br />From Miletus, Paul sent to Ephesus for the elders of the church. <br />When they arrived, he said to them: "You know how I lived the whole time I was with you, from the first day I came into the province of Asia. I served the Lord with great humility and with tears…However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me-- the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.”</span> <span style="font-weight:bold;">Acts 20:16-24</span></blockquote>In summary, the passage summarizes the Apostle Paul’s passion for repentance, faith, and the Gospel of Grace. It’s his impassioned plea for his co-laborers in the Gospel to see how he has given his life for the furthering of God’s Kingdom. <br /><br />In the center of this Paul’s words, one proclamation captures my attention—and I hope yours: <span style="font-style:italic;">“You know how I lived the whole time I was with you.”</span><br /><br />As a leader of a small group, or any other Christ-centered community, these words must cause us to evaluate our own faith journey. They must cause us to consider our own leadership. Do those in my Christ-centered community truly know me? Do they genuinely know how I have lived? And how I am living today?<br /><br />They should.<br /><br />Transparency and authenticity is critical to the life of a spiritual leader. How can someone follow your lead if they don’t know you? How can those in your community support you if they don’t know your heart? <br /><br />Living openly and honestly about your pain points, your struggles, your joys, and your victories is crucial to the health of your community—and ultimately the ministry that comes from your hand and from those in your group.<br /><br />The Apostle Paul made a bold proclamation—<span style="font-style:italic;">“you know how I have lived.</span>” Can you say the same?Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-65462365518149252732011-04-27T00:16:00.000-06:002011-04-27T00:20:14.931-06:00The Jesus in You, The Jesus In Me<blockquote><em>“The Christian needs another Christian who speaks God’s Word to him. He needs him again and again when he becomes uncertain and discouraged…The Christ in his own heart is weaker than the Christ in the word of his brother.”</em> <br /><strong>-- Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Pastor / Theologian / Martyr</strong></blockquote>I heard a great story this week. The kind of story that encourages your heart about the impact of a small group of Christ followers engaged with each other in community. <br /><br />The story is about a man who’s currently serving in vocational Christian ministry. He holds a key position within his organization. He’s wresting with some ideas that could have lasting ministry impact. Yet he was hesitant to present his ideas for change. He wasn’t sure the time was right. He wasn’t sure if he was the right person to bring these new ministry-shaping ideas to the key decision-makers in his organization. <br /> <br />He prayed about what to do. He remained uncertain…<br /><br />Then he went to his small group. That’s when the quote from Bonhoeffer’s classic work on community came to life. <br /><br />He opened up with his small group about his ideas and told them of how he had been seeking the Father on what to do. Yet he remained unclear. He asked his small group to speak into his situation. <br /><br />The group heard his plea. They knew how intentionally he had sought wisdom and discernment from the Father. They listened as he wrestled. Then something significant happened. They encouraged him. They spoke words of truth into his life. He listened. And received the Godly nudge that he needed.<br /><br />The following day, he walked into his office and presented his ministry idea. The president of his organization loved it! Wheels are now turning to put this new idea into motion. <br /><br />The power of Christ in small group community has tangible impact in the lives of those willing to be honest, real, and seek Godly counsel. <br /><br />Allow the Jesus in others to encourage the Jesus in you!Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-49339201431174429562011-04-05T09:31:00.003-06:002011-04-05T09:45:59.014-06:00Take a Diversion!<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-xyg6M6k_K3c/TZs27cgtJgI/AAAAAAAAAKQ/4UgmLvUehAg/s1600/IMAG0677.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 134px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-xyg6M6k_K3c/TZs27cgtJgI/AAAAAAAAAKQ/4UgmLvUehAg/s200/IMAG0677.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5592123757204153858" /></a>My family just returned from a great vacation in Southern Arizona. We re-connected with some friends from our small group who moved to Tucson a year ago. The dads hung out and watched Spring Training baseball, the wives talked and shared parenting tips, and the kids played and played and played. We had a great time!<br /><br />And then it was time to come home. So we loaded up the minivan and began the long trek. Lots of miles and road signs laid between us and our mid-point hotel destination. <br /><br />After four hours on the road, a few pit stops mixed in for good measure, we were presented with a choice—take a diversion to see a city (Sedona, AZ) that came highly recommended by friends or stay on task and keep driving the Interstate to get to our night’s destination.<br /><br />We took the diversion. Wow, are we glad we did! We were blown away by the beauty of God’s creation that envelops Sedona. It was simply breathtaking. And it was something that we would never have enjoyed had we stayed on task.<br /><br />That got me thinking about small groups. (Yes, I’m weird like that.) I couldn’t help but think of our natural propensity to want to stay on task in a small group meeting. Whether the focus of the night is to finish a chapter or to spend the evening in prayer—all too often we get passionately tied to our agenda. We get locked in. Focused. <br /><br />When we do this, we miss the diversion that could breathe life into our souls. We miss the opportunity to be surprised. <br /><br />I’m not suggesting that every meeting should be a hunt for rabbit trails—structure and consistency to your group’s meeting time is crucial. But it’s also important for a small group community, at any given time, to be open to taking a diversion. You just might experience something that blows you away!Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25620876.post-74184322926287499312011-03-23T08:59:00.001-06:002011-03-23T09:02:40.812-06:00Do You Really Care About Each Other?Do you really care about the other members of your small group? Not just a passing “I’ll pray for you” sort of thing. I mean the kind of care that you don’t mind if someone called you in the middle of the night sort of care and concern? I’m talking about a “you-hurt-when-they-hurt” experience? <br /><br />Recently, I met with a small group leader who shared his story of Christian community heartbreak. He and his young family had attended their church for many years. They were connected in a church-based community. They attended worship regularly. People knew them. They were cared for…or so they thought.<br /><br />In their deepest hour of need, their utter lack of community broke their hearts. This man told me that in the midst of a family crisis—the sudden and severe illness of his infant child—the lack of community was deafening. <br /><br />No phone calls. No emails. No visits. Nothing!<br /><br />When his local body of believers had a golden opportunity to be The Church—they let him down. In a word, he and his wife were “heartbroken”.<br /><br />Today, their child is healthy. And so is this couple. They’ve become an integral part of a vibrant small group at our church, and he told me that his engagement in a Christ-centered community that loves well is something he does not take for granted.<br /><br />In a couple’s deepest hour of need, their Christ-centered community needs to be the hands and feet of Jesus. Can your group count on each other?<br /><br />It’s a question that you absolutely <em>must </em>have an answer to—an honest answer.Created For Communityhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07294276730864901910noreply@blogger.com0